Juno, Queen of the Cave

Juno, Queen of the Cave | Short Story

Posted on September 7, 2025 by oli tempest Leave a comment

Happy 1st Adoption Anniversary, Juno! ♥ Here’s to many more years of cozy cuddles and cat caves ♥

‘Mmm,’ Juno thought, blinking slowly. She was sat, poised, in the middle of the loungeroom, bathed in warm sunlight. A gentle breeze drifted in through the open window, tickling the tips of her fur. With the wind came birdsong, which, at another hour, may have captured Juno’s interest. However, in this moment, with a stomach full of breakfast, there was only one thing on the madam’s mind.

Nap time.

There was only one method of digestion appropriate for the royal class, which is to do it while you sleep. Juno, being royalty herself, was well aware of this, thank you very much. But, that begged the question — where to nap?

‘This room is pleasant enough,’ she mused, ‘perhaps, I shall sleep atop my throne’.

When Juno referred to her throne, of course, she meant the cat tree — handcrafted by one of her human subjects.

In one deft movement, Juno leapt up to the middle platform. Even at her elegant age, she remained nimble — much to her pride’s delight.

She then daintily hopped up to the top level, above the cubby that had been specifically made for her. The roof was meant for the Gremlin Who Plagues The Peace, but he didn’t seem to be around right now. Regardless, all the land (in this house) belonged to her Queendom, including this throne.

Juno did the customary “walk once in a clockwise circle” ritual before settling down for her slumber. With a swift glance across her domain, she confirmed the peace-plaguer was nowhere to be seen. Satisfied she was in the clear, Juno closed her eyes and let her mind drift. Perhaps, today, she would dream of chasing small critters through the bushes, or watching birds peck the lawn, or maybe–

Chomp.

Juno bolted upright, growling at the sudden, sharp sensation in her tail. She snapped round to see what had bitten her. Sure enough, it had appeared.

The gremlin flinched back, ears flat and eyes like saucers. It was as though he had a sixth sense that alerted him whenever she tried to rest.

‘Insolent whelp’, she growled, guttural and low.

“Bllrlrlrollr,” he replied.

Juno could not understand his infernal tongue. If she could, she may have realised he was grumpy about her sleeping in his bed. But she couldn’t. It wouldn’t be proper.

However, she could understand his body language. He had pulled back onto his hind legs, his wide eyes unblinking, and Juno knew he was preparing to launch another mischievous attack. She could face him head-on, defending herself against the siege, but, being Queen, she had another, cleverer idea.

With the same agility at which she had ascended the cat tree, she leapt to the ground.

The youngling clearly needed that nap spot more than she did, so Juno had opted for the noble choice of allowing him to borrow it from her… temporarily. A choice of which she was feeling rather proud right now.

‘Indeed,’ Juno puffed, her tail high as she trotted away, ‘I am a benevolent and generous Queen.’

The goblin child laid down with a flop, his tail flicking as he watched Juno exit the room to find a different, better place to sleep, both of them feeling victorious.

the aforementioned goblin child, caught disturbing the peace

The click-clacking of a keyboard caught Juno’s attention. She followed the noise into the studio room, where she saw one of her human subjects sat at their desk. Their lap piqued Juno’s interest.

‘Hmm,’ she pondered, ‘If I sleep there, the imp won’t be able to disturb me again.’

Impressed by her excellent plan, Juno assumed the position: sat at the base of the chair, gazing up at her human. She knew they couldn’t understand her regal language, so she had learnt a different way to communicate.

‘Eyes large and round, check. Front paws brought politely together, check. And now…’

“Mraow!”

‘…That ought to get their attention.’

As expected, her human turned to look at her.

“Hi madam!” They exclaimed, their tone jubilant.

They patted their lap, “You wanna come up?”

Juno did, indeed, want to go up.

She raised her front paws, placing them daintily on the brim of the seat, gauging optimal trajectory. Once she had calculated for perfect elegance, she stepped back and lowered her front paws slightly, before jumping upon her human’s lap.

“Good girl!” They said.

‘Yes,’ Juno thought, ‘I am a good girl.’

Her human’s scent was familiar and their body heat cosy. Before she knew it, Juno was purring. Her humans always responded affectionately to such a noise and this time was no different. Juno tilted her head, leaning into the scratches and fussing until…

‘Ack!’ Juno thought in alarm. She flinched away from the human’s hand, ‘What kind of betrayal is this?!’

While Juno’s eyes had been closed, the human had poked their finger in the corner of Juno’s eye.

The human whipped their hand away, “Sorry princess! You just had some eye gunk! I got it though — does that feel better?”

Juno looked up at the human in dismay, ‘Princess?! I am a Queen. And Queens do not get eye gunk!’

Juno had forgotten that this human had a compulsion to groom her whenever they cuddled. Their audacity was astounding. Juno was quite capable of grooming herself, thank you very much (although she was partial to being brushed… on occasion. And definitely on her own terms).

Juno fled, hopping down from the human’s lap and trotting out of the room.

‘Is there nowhere fit for a Queen to snooze?’

Dejected, sleep deprived, and grumpy, Juno sat in the hallway, considering her options.

There was always the bedroom, but she had only just risen from there and she wanted more variety in her nap spots.

The laundry was too cold, and besides, sleeping near the toilets was hardly fitting for somecat of her standing.

There was a fluffy mat in the bathroom that Juno was quite fond of… But when she inspected it, she found it still damp from her human’s shower earlier that morning.

The ratbag was still in the loungeroom… but, where else was there to go?

proof that, though they sometimes bicker, they are friends, actually ♥

Just as she began to wonder whether she would find anywhere suitable, Juno heard a sound coming from the loungeroom. She turned her ears towards the source of the noise.

“Juno~! Come here!”

The humans called to her, which gave Juno an idea. Perhaps they might be able to help her. She could do her usual “mroaw” at them, and then sit directly in their eyeline, making unblinking eye contact, until they correctly guess what she needs. A clever strategy that had never failed before.

Hope renewed, Juno trotted back into the loungeroom, rehearsing her “mroaw” routine in her head as she went. But, her preparation was all for naught. For as she entered the room, she saw a cave, haloed in the sun spilling in from the window.

It was a splendid, magnificent cave. Handcrafted for her out of locally-sourced cushions and blankets — Juno would recognise her human subject’s handiwork anywhere. In her peripheral vision, she could see her human craftsman, his eyes glittering as he showed off his latest masterpiece.

He patted the couch at the entrance to the cave, “Look, Juno! It’s a cave!”

Juno could see that, she was just taking a moment to collect herself, lest her emotions become unbecoming.

The humans called to her some more, excitedly summoning her to the cave with which she had already become enraptured. She didn’t know how to tell them she loved it, so instead, she regally adjusted her hindquarters before leaping directly into the cave’s entrance.

It was everything she had hoped for and more. Three walls and a roof, with a slight blanket overhang for extra cosiness. The inside was warmed from the sun, but dark enough to ease falling asleep. The squishy walls provided some insulation from the breeze, as well as noises that might otherwise disturb her slumber.

As is custom, Juno did the single clockwise turn before settling into a circular shape. The humans seemed gleeful as they watched her nestle into the cave cocoon. Juno’s heart was full, her body weary, and mind content.

She peeked beyond the entrance briefly, to check for the gremlin. She caught a glimpse of him, but he was far from his usual pesky ways. Instead, he was fast asleep, still at the top of the cat tree where Juno had left him. She also saw both her human subjects sat on the floor beneath the cave, playing with some kind of odd human toys.

‘Well, so long as my humans are there, the child won’t be able to bother me… Although, I suppose he’s not all that bad,’ Juno conceded, ‘I can allow him some cuddle time, within reason.’

She sighed. Birds chirped beyond the window, the humans chattered and laughed while they played their games, and the kitten twitched his nose in his dreams.

Safe, secluded, and settled – Juno closed her eyes and fell fast asleep. It was nap time, at last.

the Queen of the Cave herself, madam Juno, in her natural habitat(s) ♥

♥ Happy 1st Anniversary, Juno! ♥

I love this cat with my whole heart, and I especially love how much she loves caves. I also love my partner’s cute habit of constructing caves for her around the house, so she always has somewhere cosy and safe to sleep.

It’s been a year since we welcomed her into our family, and she brings so much joy to our lives every single day. I know she can’t read, but I wanted to do something to commemorate the occasion, and this is where my inspiration led me. Besides, I have read her a bedtime story before, and I will do it again.

Happy Anniversary to the funniest, loveliest, sassiest madam – here’s to many more years of cat cuddles and caves ♥